One Born Every Minute liveblog 4/4/2012

…and now…the end is near…and so we face…the final curtain…it’s the final episode of series 3 (surely there will be more?) of One Born Every Minute tonight. Wait! They’re doing a what happened next programme tomorrow! Only it doesn’t feature any of my favourite families/births (and actually features one that made me want to pull my own arm off so I had something to hurl at the television) and I’m out tomorrow night (I know!) anyway so I’m not fussed about that…

Last week I said I’d watch the finale with mozzarella-based snacks and a cheeky glass of fizz. Sadly I have neither, although I’m fairly sure I spotted a bottle of Pinot in the fridge so I may have to have a glass (or two) to celebrate the end of 14 weeks of liveblogging mad skillz.

See you back here for bumps, blood, bottoms, boobs, births and babies at 9pm.

21.01 Bit late. Just kissing Dh before he disappears off to bed (early shift at work this week) but I’M HEEEEEEERE!

21.03 Midwifery really is a job for life. Very few vocations like that these days. If the Tories stay in power in five years time babies will be delivered by volunteers.Can you imagine? ‘Sorry, you can’t have your baby today because your community volunteer has decided to go to the beach. Hold it in and pop back next week’.

21.06 Some men are complete fuckers aren’t they?

21.08 I totally sympathise with her. My fanjo felt like it was on fire every time I had an internal. I should’ve kicked the doctor that looked like Ravi Bopara in the face when I had the chance…might have helped his cricket…

21.10 It’s stuff like this that reinforces my belief in fate and things that are ‘meant’ to happen. I’m not religious but I genuinely believe that things happen for a reason and certain people are destined to meet.

21.18 I envy the cameraderie that the midwives have. They genuinely make a difference to people’s lives and, as they said, they’re the first to put a hand on a new baby. Must be an amazing buzz, regardless of how many years you’ve been doing it.

21.20 Oh. Oh. I remember sobbing the first month that we tried and I had my period and it was really awful. I was lucky enough to fall pregnant the second month. I can’t imagine what it must be like to have years and years of trying and no baby. I feel like a bitch for even whingeing about my two. I don’t know I’m bloody (One) born.

21.25 It may be the Pinot I’m drinking but I feel a bit weepy. No-one should be alone whilst in labour.

21.27 I like the fact that she sounds really Canadian and then she sounds really Yorkshire. Loovleh.

21.33 I wish my Mum had been there when I had the girls. Not necessarily in the operating theatre, but at the hospital. It’s my fault for being so insular about it all. I feel bad for depriving her of the chance to be there on the day I gave birth.

21.35 It’s so sad that the father of the child has not interest, and that his family aren’t supporting her in any way. The thought of her printing off a picture of the father and putting it in a memory box for the child makes me want to weep (again).

21.37 Ooh! She’s got herself a new buff man. At least, I hope it’s a man. It might be a spaniel.

21.42 CROSS BABY ALERT! Isla’s a lovely name though 🙂 I do like a wobbly-faced new Dad. Their face changes the moment the baby is born and it’s so lovely to watch.

21.50 Girls! We run the world! Girls! We run this mutha. Yeah! *puts wine glass down*

21.53 Isabel Esme *nods approvingly*

21.56 Plinky plonky birth music time. She’s spelt Isabel wrong though *pedantic face*

22.00 There we have it. Two more babies born, lives changed forever, one midwife retiring. I love One Born…no, I ADORE One Born. My two are growing up rapidly and the pregnancy, birth and newborn baby days are now an increasingly distant memory. I’m not broody anymore and I know that I’m not going to have any more babies of my own but I love watching other people’s lives change in the same way that ours did back in 2007.

If Channel 4 don’t do another series I’m going to camp out at their headquarters in Horseferry Road with placards until they change their minds.

p.s. Can future revisit shows feature Joy and Fabio and Janet and Ralph please? Pretty please? 🙂

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