Batshit teapot

My sister J is a bit fabulous: tall, well-dressed, gorgeous, well-educated with high-powered important job and extremely well-travelled. In short, if she wasn’t so darned lovely I would be terribly, terribly jealous of her. Who am I kidding? I am terribly terribly jealous of her.

She also buys us brilliant presents. For example, for Christmas this year she bought me a months’ membership to Pinapple Dance Studios so that I could fulfill my ambition to have tap dancing lessons. For my birthday she bought me a Radley handbag.

I find her very difficult to buy for and just before Christmas, I was really struggling. We’d had some family photos done so I’d created a calendar featuring some of the best photos, a collage poster print of all of the photos and a couple of smaller presents. However, I really needed to get her something else. Something meaningful. Something lovely. Something that would always remind her of us.

I had a brainwave. There is a ceramic cafe in Greenwich called Biscuit so I thought I would take the girls there so they could paint a teapot for her. J loves tea. She loves tea even more thanΒ  salsa dancing and the Essex cricket team put together.

It all started well:

G and R with the unsullied teapot

It was all going well until they started painting….I think my mistake was allowing them to paint the same object at the same time.The idea was that they would do a side each, but they kept blobbing paint on the bits the other one had already painted changing their minds about what they wanted to paint.

I offered to paint the lid. My hand was batted away with a (loaded) paintbrush.

After an hour the girls declared that they were finished:

To keep you on your toes, they swapped seats half-way through.

Shall we see the full horror close-up? Brace yourselves…

It looks insane doesn’t it?

I took the teapot up to the counter so that they could take it away for glazing and the staff struggled to stifle their giggles. I knew it woudln’t be ready in time for Christmas so I had the photos developed and popped them in an envelope with the rest of J’s presents so tell the ‘story’ of the teapot.

Ten days later…I remembered that we needed to collect the finished article. I was too embarrassed busy to pick it up myself so I sent Dh.

Here is Batshit Teapot in its full, glazed glory:

J is coming over tomorrow to collect it. There’s only so many times I can say sorry…



7 thoughts on “Batshit teapot

  1. Ahhh I think it’s lovely – very an accident at the Emma Bridgewater factory look πŸ˜‰ You’ve given me inspiration for all birthday gifts this year – we’ve got a ceramic cafe on one of the barges at the marina!!

    • Did I ever tell you about the espresso cups we were going to paint for Dh’s birthday? When we got there the girls decided that he would prefer a fish and a dinosaur…so that’s what he got! Difficult to drink an espresso out of them… πŸ˜‰

      It is great fun though – as long as you’re prepared to supervise very, very closely!

  2. Am still choking on my laughter! This literally had me clutching my sides. I’m sure your sis will either display it to all guests as an original piece with style and aplomb (and it sounds like she may well be the kind of girl who is able to carry this off!), or she will save it for those “me time” brews with a pile of her favourite biscuits and a good book/magazine – guaranteed to get her thinking lovely thoughts about her cute little nieces and sweet, thoughtful sister. Either way, if she’s half the sister you make her out to be, she will surely treasure it forever.

    PS: Love those cheeky scamps at the top of the page!

    • Thank you! I gave it to her today and she burst out laughing. She’s going to take it into work and use it there. I said it would make quite a talking point! Plus we can embarrass the girls when we show them it in ten years’ time… πŸ˜‰

  3. Pingback: Bon Voyage Aunty J | House of Twins 2.0

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